Gaara, What Are You Doing to That Popsicle?
by EqualsEquivalent
Summary: Gaara, Sasuke, Popsicles, Sake, Man sex... You know your interested. XD Still don't own Naruto by the way. Took the sequel and made a second chapter
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So it just occurred to me that I've never written a SasuGaa. I am a huge fan of the pairing so I'm wondering why I've never written it. So this is based on an experience I had with one of my friends who I am sorry to day doesn't have a passion for anime and manga. But anyway she also doesn't have a cosplay name but you know what? I don't care; it's a funny story and a weird experience…So here it is!**

**XD**

"Um, Gaara," Sasuke asked his friend who was honestly creeping him out right now. "What are you doing with that Popsicle?"

"What does it look like, dumbass?" was Gaara's loving response

Gaara was currently rubbing a red Popsicle on his - as far as Sasuke knew his first- sunburn.

"I think your being overly dramatic" Sasuke told him bluntly

"Yeah well you know what? - Gaara asked while holding up the half melted Popsicle-"It's fucking painful and it's radiating heat!"

Sasuke walked into the kitchen and opened the freezer. He pulled out another Popsicle, green this time, and threw it at Gaara's head. The Popsicle smacked him in the forehead.

"What the hell?" Gaara screamed at him

"Just helping you cool down" Sasuke told him noticing the red juice dripping off of Gaara's arm and onto the couch. Sasuke walked to his irritated lover and plopped next to him, taking the opportunity to lick some of the artificially flavored cherry Popsicle juice off of his arm.

"Sasuke you are so weird" Gaara commented while opening the green Popsicle Sasuke had thrown at him

"Don't pretend you don't love it" Sasuke told him followed by a sexy smirk

"Don't even think about it Sasuke Uchiha! You're not getting any until this damn sunburn heals" Gaara told him with a slightly malicious look.

"Well then let me remedy that for you, you know how much I hate blue balls" Sasuke whispered placing kisses across Gaara's shoulders and down his arm.

"Sasuke…" Gaara warned

"What?" Sasuke asked innocently before tackling Gaara onto the couch.

Sasuke was now sitting on Gaara's crotch. Gaara hissed under his breath having landed on his sunburn but just couldn't resist Sasuke. Since Gaara was already shirtless, having sunburn that stretched across much of his torso, Sasuke pulled his shirt over his head before bending down to start a very heated kiss with Gaara. Sliding their tongues across each other's the need for oxygen soon became a burden and they were forced to separate to take in some of the oxygen that for some reason was vital to life.

Peeling off clothes Gaara and Sasuke were soon exposed and ready to fuck. Grinding his cock against Gaara's Sasuke couldn't help but feel overwhelming affection for his slightly-below-average red head.

Then without warning Sasuke plunged into Gaara. Gaara let out a combination of a scream and a moan. Screaming because he didn't see that coming even when he should have and moaning because through the pain he was feeling a lot of pleasure.

Sasuke thrust into Gaara slowly, but at Gaara's command moved at a quicker pace. Gaara let out a scream of pure lust as Sasuke slammed into his prostate.

"Right there!" Gaara yelled

Sasuke listened to his uke and pounded that spot again and again. Gaara let out another scream as he came all over his and Sasuke's chests. With a few more thrusts Sasuke came. He pulled out of Gaara and observed the cum leak onto the couch.

"That's gonna be a bitch to clean later" Sasuke commented

"Who cares?" Gaara asked still in post-orgasmic bliss.

Sasuke chose at this moment to fall of the couch. Gaara started cracking up, something that most people didn't see, but then again how many people had seen Sasuke fall?

"Will you shut up?" Sasuke asked "Or would you like to lose your walking ability?"

Gaara knew this wasn't an idle threat and quickly shut his mouth.

"That's better" Sasuke told him with a triumphant smile.

Gaara punched Sasuke in the arm and walked into the kitchen for another Popsicle, since the green one had long melted into the carpet. Sasuke followed him and grabbed a bottle of sake.

"Are you planning on sharing?" Gaara asked Sasuke in a joking tone

"Maybe for you…"Sasuke said in mock uncertainty

And with that Sasuke popped open the bottle with his teeth and proceeded to take a long swig. He passed the bottle to Gaara who paused in his Popsicle rubbing to take a drink. Gaara handed the bottle back to Sasuke who took another generous portion. Gaara took his share and things went in this direction until the bottle ended up empty on the floor next to the recent green stain.

"Dude, I'm hammered" Sasuke announced and slurred at the same time to no one in particular.

"I know right…" Gaara barely managed to slur, Gaara didn't have much of an alcohol tolerance.

Gaara was, at the moment hanging upside down from the arm of the couch and then sitting up, feeling the blood rush to and from his head.

"Dude, your gonna like kill your brain and stuff" Sasuke drunkenly informed him

"Okay" was Gaara's only and quite loopy response.

"Is not funny" Sasuke attempted to scold

"Yeah, yeah it is" Gaara replied with a dumb smile as he then landed on his shoulders on the floor. "Ow" he said after about a minute of actually laying on his sunburn.

Gaara wondered for the first time what had happened to his Popsicle, and when he finally mustered enough drunken energy to get up he saw Sasuke eating his Popsicle.

"You bastard" Gaara said in a slurred tone with perhaps a little emotion in the actual sentence.

With this statement Gaara tackled Sasuke causing the Popsicle to fly through the air.

"My Popsicle!" they yelled at the same time "Your Popsicle? You mean my Popsicle!" they yelled, also simultaneously.

"My Popsicle!" Gaara yelled

"Mine!" Sasuke yelled back

Things continued in this manner until Sasuke grabbed Gaara and rolled him off the couch, they actually rolled through the puddle that was once the green Popsicle before noticing the puddle of the most recent Popsicle in a puddle on the tile entryway.

This is when an unfortunate Neji walked inside to find two naked men covered in various fluids kneeling next to a puddle of melted Popsicle still arguing over whose Popsicle it actually was.

**A/N 2: So there you have it pointless sex and drunken humor! What more could you want? By the way the only part of this story that happened in real life was the whole rubbing the Popsicle on your arm thing.** **Since you know I'm a girl and so is my friend who this happened with so we can't really have man sex on a couch. Also we're under 21 so we can't chug a bottle of sake then have a Popsicle related argument. But you know it was still funny. Hop you like my random as hell story written at 4 in the morning.**

**XD**


	2. Chapter 2: An Awkward Explanation

**A/N: So this is a sequel to _Gaara, What are you Doing to that Popsicle? _This is just going to be a funny fic that does exactly what the title says it will.**

**XD**

Neji sat on Gaara and Sasuke's couch, carefully avoiding the remnants of their earlier affair, his arms were folded and his legs crossed. His eyes were partially crazed due to his earlier walking in on something he never wanted to see. Ever.

Sasuke was lounging on the other side of the couch with Gaara draped in his lap, both were recovering from hangovers and trying to explain to their dear friend just what it was that he had saw.

"It was all Sasuke's fault." Gaara stated as if were the most obvious answer to Neji's questioning gaze. After this remark Sasuke briefly stood, Gaara tumbling from his lap. Sasuke sat back down with a rather smug look on his face.

Gaara glared indignantly at Sasuke but didn't make an attempt to go back to his lap, or even get off of the floor. "Do you see what I put up with?" Gaara asked of Neji, his lower lip protruding slightly. Neji aimed a kick at Gaara's shoulder, clearly still miffed.

"Do you know what I put up with?" Neji asked back, multiple answers running through his mind, along the lines of Shikamaru, his perverted friends, the _constant_ (Neji's left eye twitched a little) cracks about his feminine appearance...(not like the crossed limbs were helping the case) "Because I am not really ready to forgive this"

"What is there to forgive?" Sasuke all but shouted

"Perhaps my mental angst!"

"It's not my fault that you have no appreciation for sex, popsicles and alcohol!" Sasuke replied, his voice ripping through an octave.

Neji and Gaara both chuckled under their breathes and Sasuke kicked Gaara in the ribs while glaring at Neji who was out of kicking range. Gaara had to admit that the kick was good considering he hadn't even been looking at his target.

Gaara grunted as he got up off the carpet and plopped next to Sasuke. "How about this, we all agree that Neji just forgets and me and Sasuke won't bring it up" He glared pointedly at Sasuke as he said that last part.

"My lips are sealed" Sasuke said to the red head next to him who if he wasn't mistaking was slowly working his way back towards Sasuke's lap.

"I can work that" Neji stated with a sigh " I supposed you to are forgiven" He added as he rose to leave.

"What was-!" Sasuke started before Gaara clamped his hand over Sasuke's mouth. Neji gave a final glare as he walked out listening to Gaara smacking Sasuke over the head for licking his hand. Neji shook his head and sighed again. Who said ukes were submissive?

**A/N2: What did you think? Does it make up for the bad ending in the first one? I promise though that a sequel was on it's way until my aunt's computer decided it wanted to die. Oh well, it's done now. XD**


End file.
